i want 2 be wid u in a nice restaraunt in acandle light dinner and say the beautiful 3 words 'pay the bill'

1 drunk asked the other:What a beautiful night,look at the moon.Other drunk: U are wrong,thats not the moon,that s the sun.Both started arguing for a while when they saw another drunk walking; they stopped him,Sir,pls help settle our argument?Tell us what is that up in the sky that s shining.Is it the moon or the sun?3rd man looked at the sky and said,Sorry, I dont live around here.

Alcohol doesn't solve any problems, but then again, neither does milk.

Tip to reduce alcohal consumption :"Before marriage drink only on the days when u r sad, After marriage drink only on days when u r Happy!"

Pehle Dedar... Phir Yaar... Phir Ikraar... Phir Pyaar... Phir Intezar... Phir Takrar... Uske baad Sari Mehnat Bekar... At Last aur Ek Devdas in the Beear Bar.

Ab tak meri life ek khuli bottle thi, Jisme se sab perfume ki tarha udd jata tha. Par aap ke aane se sab kuch ruk gaya. Bhagwan kare aap jaisa DHAKKAN sabko mile!!!

Boys go to college to develop the mind, girls go to college to catch them before this happens.

Life is difficult,full of trials,sorrow,pain,but if u fall down,just stand up straight be confident & say .....+*+**DHAKKA KISNE MARA BE**+*+.....

Student scared of a thrashing bcz of poor marks did not go home and joind royal challengers bangalore! Why??Bcz they dont beat anyone.

Q: What kind of food does a race horse eat? A: Fast food

Son:I wana tel u something Dad: Its not gud 2 talk while eating(After eating) Dad: Now tell me Son: There was a Cockroach in ur food!

Definition of a Nurse A young and beautiful woman who fingers u in all places n holds ur hand and then expects ur pulse to be normal