Teacher: Pappu, TAMSO MA JYOTIR GAMYA" shloka ka kya arth hai? Pappu: Tum so jayo maa, mein Jyoti ke pass ja raha hoon.

SANTAr: Doctor help me, mein jab baat karta huun to muje sirf awaaz sunai deti hai, aadmi nahi dikhta. Dr: Aaisa kab hota hai? SANTA: Phone karte waqt.

Santa: "Kitna padhey likhe(qualified) ho?" Banta: "B.A." Santa: "Saala, 2 akshar padha, woh bhi ulta?"

Santa: Do you know English? Banta: Yes Santa: Ok! Then tell what is the opposite of NAAG PANCHAMI? Banta: So simple Yaar... NAAG DO NOT PUNCH ME.

Santa saw a man stealing a purse. THIEF:"There is Rs.1100 in the purse. V can take 50-50" Santa : Okay,bt Wht bout d remaining 1000?

Teacher:Batao 'A' k baad kya ata hai?Santa thodi der sochne k baad bola..............."Kya Bolti tu..!"

Santa Singh returned back from the cinema hall without watching the cinema.what was the name of the cinema? Ans:NO ENTRY

Santa was driving car zigzag on the road. Traffic inspector stopped him. Santa: Sir, I am learning the car. Inspector: without instructor ? Santa: Sir, this is a correspondence course.

Bus AccidentMan Cryin: "Mera hath katgaya.Bot dukh raha he"Santa:"Abe,chup beth.dekh wo admika gala kat gaya,fir b wo chup-chap pada hena!"

Santa dials a number. A girl receives the call. Santa: Who r u? Girl: Seeta here. Santa: Maine to Chandigarh phone kiya tha, yeh to Ayodhya mil gaya.

santa took an answering machine home and fixed it home somewhere in Rajasthan,but two days later disconnected it because he was getting complaints like "Saala phone utha ke bolta hai ghar pe nahin hai" ( "he picks up the receiver and then says he is not at home" )

santa saw that his friend banta was very depressed. "What happened ?" asked Santa . "Yaar, I lost Rs. 800 in a bet yesterday . " "How come ?" "Well, yesterday, the one-day match between India and England was being shown live on TV.I bet Rs.500 that India would win, but I lost the bet." " But thats only Rs. 500, where did the rest go ?" " Yaar, I bet on the highlights too