Girl: When we get married, I want to share all your worries, troubles and lighten your burden. Boy: It’s very kind of you, darling, but I don’t have any worries or troubles. Girl: Well that’s because we aren’t married yet.

An American couple had a black baby,The husband did not believe that it was his baby.H-Why is the baby black?Wife-U Hot,i Hot,Baby burnt.

Sardar to Mali : Go and water the garden. Mali : It's raining outside. Sardar : Bloody don't give excuses. Take umbrella and go.

He said... Do u love me just coz my father left me a fortune? She said... No stupid, I'd love u no matter who left you the money!

Boss: Drive slow. Driver: But sir, u said you want to reach the hospital fast. Boss: Yes, but not as a patient..

Santa's wife dies. He is calm, but his wife's lover is crying furiously... Finally, santa consoles him: Don't worry buddy, I will marry again

Teacher : Peter,why are you late for school again? PeteWell, Miss,I dreamed that I was playing football and the game went into extra time

A Student goes into a library & asks for a book on suicide..! Librarian: "Get lost dude, U won't bring it back.

TEACHER : Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?SIMON : No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.

Guide: I welcome u all to the Niagra falls. These are the world s largest Waterfalls and the sound intensity of the Waterfall is so high, sound of even 20 supersonic planes passing cant be heard! Now may I request the ladies to keep quiet so that we can hear the Niagra falls??

Q:There is always a sign board'DRIVE SLOWLY' near school,bt never near girls college.Why? Ans:BECAUSE HERE VEHICLES AUTOMATICALLY GET SLOW!

TEACHER== Name four members of the cat family? STUDENTS== Daddy cat,Mummy cat and two kittens