TEACHER : IF U HAVE 12 CHOCOLATES U GV 5 TO LEENA,3 TO TINA,4 TO MEENA, DEN WHAT WIL U GET? STUDENT: 3 NEW GIRLFRIENDS

Wife: Im ashamed of the way we live; papa pays the house rent, my brother sends food and clothing, aunty pays our electric and water bills and my friend Sheela buys us movie tickets.I dont like to complain but now its too much. Husband: U shud be ashamed; uve still got 1 sister and 2 brothers, who dont send us even a single penny.

If your wife wants to learn to drive, don't stand in her way.

TEACHER : What a pair of strange socks you are wearing, one is green and one is blue with red spots ! PAPPU: Yes it’s really strange. I’ve got another pair just like that at home.

A Student goes into a library & asks for a book on suicide..! Librarian: "Get lost dude, U won't bring it back.

Commerce professor asks the student: what is the most important source of finance for starting business? Student: "Father in law".

Teacher:2rrow thr ll b a lecture on D Sun.U must all attend Raju:I'll nt b able 2 mak it Sir.Teachr:y?Raju:Mom ll nt let me go so far

Gal: Do u have any sentimental love cards? Shopkeeper: How about this card, it says 'To the only boy I ever loved' Gal: Great! I want 10 of them.

What did one magnet say to the other? I find you very attractive.

1st thief:Oh ! The police is here. Quick! Jump out of the window!2nd thief: But this is the 13th floor.1st thief: Hurry! this is no time for superstitions

TeacheHarbhajan is male or female? Student: Female. TeacheHow? Student: Just now commentator told "beautiful delivery by harbajan"

Sir:G.Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree,but also admitted doing it. Now,kid, do you know why his father didn't punish him?"kid:Because George still had the axe in his hand.