Napolean: In my dictionary there's no word called "IMPOSSIBLE" SANTA:Abhi bolne se kya faida,jab kharida tabhi barabar dekhna chahiye tha...!!!...

Santa and Banta are waiting at a bus stop, when a bus pulls up and opens the door. Banta leans inside and asks the driver, "Will this bus take me to Chandigarh?" The bus driver shakes his head and says, "No, I'm Sorry." At this Santa leans inside, smiles and twitters, "Will it take ME?"

In a train, ticket checker to a saint: Ticket please! Saint: I don't have. TT: Where do you want to go? Saint: Lord Ram's birth place, Ayodhya! TT: Come, lets go! Saint: Where? TT: Lord Krishna'a birth place, Jail.

Santa: I am so miser (kanjoos) that I went alone for my honeymoon and saved half the money. Bania: That is nothing, I saved full money. I sent my wife for honeymoon with a friend.

Judge: You are charged with throwing your mother-in-law out of your fourth-story window. Banta: I did it without thinking, your Honor. Judge: Thats no excuse! Don't you see how dangerous it might have been for anyone passing by at the time?

Pathologist:Ye urine sample nai,Apple juice hai!Santa's wife:Ek phone kar loon?Dr:Why?Wife:Santaji ko batana hai k urine botle unke tiffin me chali gayi hai

Postman: I Had To Come 5 Miles to Deliver U This Packet Santa: why did U come so far. Instead U could Have posted it....

Sardar after throwing his mobile in wateAa aa upar aa?Frnd: Arre,pani me mobile feka to wo upar kaise aaega?Sardar:Oye, kyun nahi aaega....Dolphin hai jump bhi marega!!

Santa to banta,"oye tu har sms mujhe do baar kyun bejhta hai". Banta" vo is liye, ki agar tujhe ek forward karna ho to dusra to tere paas rehna chahiye".

Santa falls in love with a nurse... After much thinking, he finally writes a love letter to her: "I luv u sister."

A man to Santa: Ur friend is kissing ur wife in ur home. Santa rushes home and came back within half an hour n slapped the man n said: He's not my friend.

Train station par ruki.1 aadmi khidki ke paas baithe sardar se- Kaun sa station hai?Sardar bahar dekh kr kuch der soch kar "lag toh railway station raha hai."