Banta: What's the difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer? Santa: The taste.

Santa goes to buy a underwear. On choosing one he asks: How much for this? Shopkeeper: Rs 500 Santa: Arey bhai daily waer dikhaao, Party wear nahin chahiye.

santa banta looking at Egyptian mummy.santa:Look so many bandages, pakka truck accident case.banta: Aaho, truck nambar bhi likha hai. BC-1760!!

Santa saw a man stealing a purse. THIEF:"There is Rs.1100 in the purse. V can take 50-50" Santa : Okay,bt Wht bout d remaining 1000?

A drunk santa fails from 3rd floor. People gather around & ask: "Sardar ji ki hoya?" He said"pata nahin main v hune aya haan"!!!

sardar ji ne apni biwi ko apne dost ke sath dekhaor apnay dost ko goli maar disardar ki biwi boli:-agar aap ka yehi behaiviour raha to 1 dinaap saray dost kho betho gay-

Maths teacher was teaching mathematical conversions.. TeacheIf 1000 kgs=ton then 3000 kgs equal how much ?Santa: Ton.! Ton.!Ton.!..

Publisher: What should be in a book to make it a bestseller? Santa: A girl on the cover and no cover on the girl.

santa saw that his friend banta was very depressed. "What happened ?" asked Santa . "Yaar, I lost Rs. 800 in a bet yesterday . " "How come ?" "Well, yesterday, the one-day match between India and England was being shown live on TV.I bet Rs.500 that India would win, but I lost the bet." " But thats only Rs. 500, where did the rest go ?" " Yaar, I bet on the highlights too

SANTA- I saw my wife going to movie with watchman Friend- Didn't U follow them?SANTA- No yaar, I have already seen that movie..!

Santa Singh : 'Look Banta, what type of glasses they have made. The top is closed. How can you fill lassi in it ?' Banta Singh : 'Yes, that's funny. And even if you make a hole at the top, how will the lassi stay in the glass when the bottom is open?'

Banta: Y did you buy ur wife a huge diamond ring for her B'day? I thought she wanted a car. Santa: She did, but where in the world was I going to find a fake car?