Boy: Mummy, if I failed in this exam I'll commite suicide.Mothe'Shut up! Never say that. If U try to do so I'll just kill you..

Santa Banta find a bomb Santa and Banta find three hand grenades and decide to take them to the police station. "What if one of them explodes before we get there?" asks Banta. "Don’t worry about it," says Santa. "We’ll just lie and tell them we only found two."

A Student goes into a library & asks for a book on suicide..! Librarian: "Get lost dude, U won't bring it back.

FATHEHow r ur grades, son?SON: Under water, Dad.FATHEUnder water? What do u mean?SON: They're below C level.

Q: Why did the scientist install a knocker on his door?A: He wanted to win the No-bell prize.

Man1: I do not want to marry bcoz I m afraid of woman.Man2: Get married soon, then u'll b afraid of only 1 woman n start loving other

What do you call a letter delivered from a chimney? A. Black mail

Teacher: Now, Johny, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating? Manu: No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook.

teachewat is the relation betn earth & moon? pappu: brother-sister. teacher:how? pappu: we cal earth dharti mata & moon as chanda mama

Whats the height of hope??? A 99 year old lady going for airtel ka naya lifetime scheme.......!!

humne suna hai ishq mein ratoin ki neend udda jati hai plzzzzzzz koi humse bhi ishq karo hume ratoin ko neend bahut aati hai.

What do u call if Bill Gate's mothr gets bored.?BEAT THISAny guess?MOTHERBOARD!Gud nite