*A young accountant stayed late at the office day after day. Finally, the boss called him in and asked for an explanation. "Well, you see sir," he stammered, "my wife works, too-- and if I get home before she does, I have to cook the dinner."

A girl comes late to class.TeacheY r u late?Girl: One boy was following me.T: So what?Girl: The boy was walking slowly.

Pappu: Mom, when I was on the bus with Dad this morning, he told me to give up my seat to a lady. Jeeto: Well, you have done the right thing. Pappu: But mom, I was sitting on daddy's lap

Gal: Do u have any sentimental love cards? Shopkeeper: How about this card, it says 'To the only boy I ever loved' Gal: Great! I want 10 of them.

Movie director:in this scene u jump from 10th floor. Actor:what if i die? director:Dats not at all a problem,It"s da last scene

Wife was teaching English Grammar to her husband. Wife- 'I am Beautiful.' Which tense is this? Husband- Past Tense.-

Two friends, who hadn't seen each other in several years, met on the street. "Who are you working for now?" asked the first. "Same people," answered the other. "My wife and four children."

Man runs home shouting pack your bags honey, i just won 10 million in lottery. wife: Do i pack for beach or Resort ? Man : Who cares? just pack and get lost.

judge-what you do? prisnor-This & that judge-where you live? prisnor-here&there judge(to policeman)-Arrest him. prisnor-when i will come out judge-sooner&later

Lady sitting on a park bench.Beggar:Hi darling.!shall v have some fun ?lady angrily:How dare U ?Beggar:Then What r U doin on my bed ?

TEACHER : IF U HAVE 12 CHOCOLATES U GV 5 TO LEENA,3 TO TINA,4 TO MEENA, DEN WHAT WIL U GET? STUDENT: 3 NEW GIRLFRIENDS

Srdr : What is the Guarantee for this mirror? Shopkeeper : Put Down from 100 feet of height. The mirror will not Break for the First 99 feets. Srdr:Wow