A man went to the

A man went to the
A man went to the police station wishing to speak with the burglar who had broken into his house the night before. “You’ll get your chance in court,” said the desk sergeant. “No, no, no!”, said the man. “I want to know how he got into the house without waking my wife. I’ve been trying to do that for years!”
  

Jan, 17 2012     308 chars (2 sms)     887 views       Jokes > English Jokes

more English Jokes SMS Messages

I bought my wife a new car. She called and said, "There was water in the carburetor." I asked her, "Where's the car?" She replied,. In the lake."
Boy friend is fun & husband is gun boy friend is light of moon & husband is month of june boy friend is tooty fruity & husband is qismat phooti
Two men are discussing their lives. One says, "I'm getting married. I'm tired of a messy apartment, dirty dishes, and no clothes to wear." The other one says, "I'm getting divorced for the same reasons."
Sir:G.Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree,but also admitted doing it. Now,kid, do you know why his father didn't punish him?"kid:Because George still had the axe in his hand.
I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our anniversary?" She said, "Somewhere I have never been!" I told her, "How about the kitchen?"
A boy goes to see a cabare dance.His mom gets angry & asks him:Did u see anything ther that u were not supposed to see?Boy:Yes,I saw DAD
Dad: if u Pass in the exam i will Present u 1 Cycle.Son: if i fail?Dad: i will Present 10 Cycle.Son: why?Dad: To Open Cycle Shop.
TeacheHow come you do not comb your hair? Boy: No comb, Sir. TeacheUse your dad's then. Boy: No hair, Sir.
TEACHER : Now, PAPPU, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating ? PAPPU: No sir, I don’t have to, my mom is a good cook.
Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what should we do? Husband: Let us stand in silence for 2 minutes
Wife: Im ashamed of the way we live; papa pays the house rent, my brother sends food and clothing, aunty pays our electric and water bills and my friend Sheela buys us movie tickets.I dont like to complain but now its too much. Husband: U shud be ashamed; uve still got 1 sister and 2 brothers, who dont send us even a single penny.
Man:I'm looking for a book-"How to control ur wife"...Salesman:Sorry, we Don't Sell Fiction