WIFE : " I wish I was a newspaper, so I'd be in ur hands all day." HUSBAND : " I too wish that u were a newspaper, so I could have a new one

I went to see the doctor who said, just be a little patient.

Physics teachr saw boy slepin Askd "Telme da unit f power" Boy woke up n said-"What sir?" Teachr exclaimd"Ok Gud Sit Down!" What=WATT!

Santa's wife dies. He is calm, but his wife's lover is crying furiously... Finally, santa consoles him: Don't worry buddy, I will marry again

Two friends, who hadn't seen each other in several years, met on the street. "Who are you working for now?" asked the first. "Same people," answered the other. "My wife and four children."

A sardar on an interview for the post of detective was asked a question - Interviewer - Who killed Gandhiji ? Sardar - Thanks for giving me the job, I will investigate.

Q: Why do brides wear white? A: To blend in with everything else in the kitchen.

WIFE: What Should I Get FOR U FROM London? HUS: A BRITISH Girl! She Left Quietly. On Her Return. HUS: My Gift? WIFE: Honey,Wait For 9Month.

A man went to the police station wishing to speak with the burglar who had broken into his house the night before. “You’ll get your chance in court,” said the desk sergeant. “No, no, no!”, said the man. “I want to know how he got into the house without waking my wife. I’ve been trying to do that for years!”

Kid: 'Mom who is God?'Mom:'God is neither male nor fmale,not child,not adult,not blak not white &he loves children'Kid:'Oh! Michael Jakson!'

What did one magnet say to the other? I find you very attractive.

Principal 2 students:U people must sleep atleast 7 hours a day.Students:Impossible sir!College is only for 6 hours!