Teacher:I wish you would pay a little attention!Student:I'm paying as little as I can sir

judge-what you do? prisnor-This & that judge-where you live? prisnor-here&there judge(to policeman)-Arrest him. prisnor-when i will come out judge-sooner&later

FATHEHow r ur grades, son?SON: Under water, Dad.FATHEUnder water? What do u mean?SON: They're below C level.

TeacheHow come you do not comb your hair? Boy: No comb, Sir. TeacheUse your dad's then. Boy: No hair, Sir.

Lady:Is this my train Station Master:No,it belongs to the Railway Company L:Don't try to be funny I mean to ask if I can take this train to Delhi SM:No Madam,Im afraid its too heavy

Wife:Honey wht ru looking4? Husband:Nothing. Wife:Nothing?U've been reading our marriage certificate 4an hour?Husband:I was just luking 4d expriy date!

Every man wants a wife who is beautiful, understanding, economical and a good cook..... But the law allows only one wife

A girl wearing very short skirt.A boy asks he Won't yr mom tell anythng abt yr dress?Girl replied: My mom will b very angry..bcoz I'm wearing her dress.

Dost Ko Dost ka Ishara yad Reheta he Hr Dost Ko Apna Dostana Yad Reheta he Kuch pal Sachhe dost k Sath to Gujaro Wo Afsana Maut tak YaaD Reheta he

Can I go to the theatre? Asks a mosquito ot her mother. "yes but be aware, pay attention during the applause."

Stalking into a police station late one night, a man demands to speak to the burglar who broke into his home. "Sorry,that's against the rule," says the desk sergeant."You didn't get it," says the man."I need to know how he got in without waking my wife."

Teachefour beautiful ladies r walking on the road. Change it to Exclamatory sentence... Student: WOW!.