Teacher:I wish you would pay a little attention!Student:I'm paying as little as I can sir

Wife: Why are you home so early? Husband: My boss told me to go to hell.

PAPPU : Daddy, have you ever been to Egypt ? FATHER : No. Why do you ask that? PAPPU: Well, where did you get THIS mummy then

Dentist: I have to pull the aching tooth, but don't worry it will take just five minutes. Patient: And how much will it cost? Dentist: It's Rs 1000. Patient: One thousand for just a few minutes work??? Dentist: I can extract it very slowly if you like

Why do elephants never forget? Because nobody ever tells them anything

Young Son: Is it true, Dad, that in some parts of Africa, a Man doesn't know his wife until he marries her? Dad: That happens in every country, son.

Teacher:The best way to double the money in stock market!Student:Invest 4 times the money!!---

Girl: When we get married, I want to share all your worries, troubles and lighten your burden. Boy: It’s very kind of you, darling, but I don’t have any worries or troubles. Girl: Well that’s because we aren’t married yet.

Boy Asks A Girl: Can U Dance With Me. GIRL: I Dont Dance With a Child.. BOY: Sorry, I did not Know U were Pregnant.

I went to see the doctor who said, just be a little patient.

What is the next thing a Man should do after winning an argument wit his Wife ?...........Apologise

He said... Do u love me just coz my father left me a fortune? She said... No stupid, I'd love u no matter who left you the money!