Two men were talking at a party. "I," said the first,"only believe half of what people tell me." "Why ?" "I'm a lawyer." "I believe twice what people tell me." "What are you ?" "A tax inspector."

somu:mobile bill kitna hai? Callcentre gal:just dial 123 to knw ur current bill status. somu:abe Stupid current ka nahi mobile ka.

Wife:Honey wht ru looking4? Husband:Nothing. Wife:Nothing?U've been reading our marriage certificate 4an hour?Husband:I was just luking 4d expriy date!

Santa Banta find a bomb Santa and Banta find three hand grenades and decide to take them to the police station. "What if one of them explodes before we get there?" asks Banta. "Don’t worry about it," says Santa. "We’ll just lie and tell them we only found two."

judge-what you do? prisnor-This & that judge-where you live? prisnor-here&there judge(to policeman)-Arrest him. prisnor-when i will come out judge-sooner&later

Boy: Mummy, if I failed in this exam I'll commite suicide.Mothe'Shut up! Never say that. If U try to do so I'll just kill you..

LAST NIGHT SHE CAME TO MY BED,LAYED ON MY BODY,TOOK LIQUID FROM MY BODY AND GOT SATISFACTION .SHE WAS A MOSQUITO

Never Explain Yourself to Anyone Because The person Who Likes U Doesnt Need It. And The Person Who Dislikes U Wont belive it....!!

A sardar was always teasing his wife "Teen bachon ki maa". One day she got angry & teased him back "ek bache ka baap

Girl: Will you love me after marriage also? Boy: This depends on your husband, if he allows me.

In A Book Shop Prospective Husband : Do U hav a Book Called "Man, de Master of Women". SalesGirl : d fiction Dept is on d Other Side,Sir

indian- i have 4 sister n 3 brothers what abt u? American-i hav no sis or no bro but i hav 4 moms frm 1st dad n 5 dads frm my 1st mom