Why r Egyptian children always confused? Because after death their daddy becomes Mummy

Dad : Son, what do you want for your birthday? Son : Not much dad, just a radio with a sports car around it.

A lady gave an advertisement in the classifieds : "Husband Wanted". Next day she received a 100 letters. They all said da same thing : "U can have mine"

Mr.bean said to his GirlFriend"I luv u"& fell down. Again Told"I luv u"&fell down.Girl: y u r doing like this? Mr.bean: I am falling in love

Wife going to Wife returns. Husband:-where is my gift? Wife:-wait 4 9months. London. Wife:-Do u want anything from England? Husband:-ya... English girl.

TEACHER : IF U HAVE 12 CHOCOLATES U GV 5 TO LEENA,3 TO TINA,4 TO MEENA, DEN WHAT WIL U GET? STUDENT: 3 NEW GIRLFRIENDS

1st thief:Oh ! The police is here. Quick! Jump out of the window!2nd thief: But this is the 13th floor.1st thief: Hurry! this is no time for superstitions

Wife: You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why? Husband: When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears. Wife: You see, how miraculous and powerful am I for you? Husband: Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, “What other problem can there be greater than this one?”

Teacher: Sonu, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his? Sonu: No, teacher, it's the same dog

A man phones a mental hospital and asks the receptionist if there is anybody in Room 27 She goes and checks, and comes back to the phone, telling him that the room is empty "Good," says the man. "That means I must have really escaped."

English Teacher: Make a sentence using "Neither-Nor" Naughty boy Student: When girls wear tight fitting dresses, "NEiTHER" are they comfortable, "NOR" are we!

A man went to the police station wishing to speak with the burglar who had broken into his house the night before. “You’ll get your chance in court,” said the desk sergeant. “No, no, no!”, said the man. “I want to know how he got into the house without waking my wife. I’ve been trying to do that for years!”