A lady gave an advertisement in the classifieds : "Husband Wanted". Next day she received a 100 letters. They all said da same thing : "U can have mine"

Q: Why do brides wear white? A: To blend in with everything else in the kitchen.

Hello My son won't come to school today,he has fever. Teacher: Oh,who's speaking? Boy: This is my father

Man receives telegram: Wife dead-should be buried or cremated? Man: Don't take any chances. Burn the body and bury the ash.

A Gujju boy fillin an application form Gets confused n asks dad:whats MOTHER TONGUE ?dad said: VERY LONG.

What did one magnet say to the other? I find you very attractive.

Why do u take your wife 2 night clubs only?Laloo-By the time she gets ready no othr place is open

Santa Banta find a bomb Santa and Banta find three hand grenades and decide to take them to the police station. "What if one of them explodes before we get there?" asks Banta. "Don’t worry about it," says Santa. "We’ll just lie and tell them we only found two."

Why do elephants never forget? Because nobody ever tells them anything

Little Johnny: Teacher, can I go to the bathroom? TeacheLittle Johnny, MAY I go to the bathroom? Little Johnny: But I asked first!

Why r Egyptian children always confused? Because after death their daddy becomes Mummy

Do you want to hear a dirty joke? B. Ok A. A white horse fell in the mud