Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what should we do? Husband: Let us stand in silence for 2 minutes

Q: Why do brides wear white? A: To blend in with everything else in the kitchen.

Stalking into a police station late one night, a man demands to speak to the burglar who broke into his home. "Sorry,that's against the rule," says the desk sergeant."You didn't get it," says the man."I need to know how he got in without waking my wife."

*A young accountant stayed late at the office day after day. Finally, the boss called him in and asked for an explanation. "Well, you see sir," he stammered, "my wife works, too-- and if I get home before she does, I have to cook the dinner."

Two men are discussing their lives. One says, "I'm getting married. I'm tired of a messy apartment, dirty dishes, and no clothes to wear." The other one says, "I'm getting divorced for the same reasons."

Doctor to lady: U look exactly like my 3rd wife. Lady: How many wife do u have? Docto2.

PAPPU : Daddy, have you ever been to Egypt ? FATHER : No. Why do you ask that? PAPPU: Well, where did you get THIS mummy then

I bought my wife a new car. She called and said, "There was water in the carburetor." I asked her, "Where's the car?" She replied,. In the lake."

Teacher: Johny, how do you spell "crocodile"? Manu: "K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L" Teacher: No, that's wrong Manu: Maybe it's wrong, but you ask me how I spell it!

A police recruit was asked during exam, "What would u do if u had to arrest ur own mother?" He said, "Call for backup."

I went to see the doctor who said, just be a little patient.

Physics teachr saw boy slepin Askd "Telme da unit f power" Boy woke up n said-"What sir?" Teachr exclaimd"Ok Gud Sit Down!" What=WATT!