What is the height of mixed emotions??? when ur mother in law falls from 7th floor on ur mercedes

Two friends, who hadn't seen each other in several years, met on the street. "Who are you working for now?" asked the first. "Same people," answered the other. "My wife and four children."

Teacher:I wish you would pay a little attention!Student:I'm paying as little as I can sir

Teacher: pappu, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago. pappu: Me!

Wife: Im ashamed of the way we live; papa pays the house rent, my brother sends food and clothing, aunty pays our electric and water bills and my friend Sheela buys us movie tickets.I dont like to complain but now its too much. Husband: U shud be ashamed; uve still got 1 sister and 2 brothers, who dont send us even a single penny.

Teache Give An example to use neither-nor. Boy: When girls wear tight fittings, neither they are comfortable nor we are comfortable…

Man calls mental hospital & asks if there is anybody in Room 27. Lady checks & tells him that the room is empty. Man: Good,that means I have really escaped.!

Teacher:The best way to double the money in stock market!Student:Invest 4 times the money!!---

when u kiss an american girl she says kiss me hard,when u kiss a british girl she say kiss me slow,but when u kiss an indian girl she says kisay nu na dasi

Can I go to the theatre? Asks a mosquito ot her mother. "yes but be aware, pay attention during the applause."

Doctor to lady: U look exactly like my 3rd wife. Lady: How many wife do u have? Docto2.

2 sardar soldiers captured a pakistani, gave him dice & said, if u get 1,2,3,4,5 V'll kill u! paki asks: 6 aya to? sardars: Then, throw again..