A police recruit was asked during exam, "What would u do if u had to arrest ur own mother?" He said, "Call for backup."

What's the quietest place in the world? The complaint department at the parachute packing plant

Srdr : What is the Guarantee for this mirror? Shopkeeper : Put Down from 100 feet of height. The mirror will not Break for the First 99 feets. Srdr:Wow

History Teacher : From where to where did the mughals rule ? Student: Sir, I am not sure but I think from page 15 to 26.

What did one magnet say to the other? I find you very attractive.

Question Girl : Do you love me ? Boy : Yes Dear Girl : Would you die for me ? Boy : No, mine is undying love!

Girl to her boyfriend: One kiss and I’ll be yours forever.The guy replies: Thanks for the warning.

Why does history keep repeating it self? Because we weren't listening the first time !

Sir:Tom,wot wud happen if there is a3rd world war?Tom:Tht wud be terrible.Sir:Why?Tom:There wll be another chapter in our history book

TEACHER : Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?SIMON : No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.

Wife: Im ashamed of the way we live; papa pays the house rent, my brother sends food and clothing, aunty pays our electric and water bills and my friend Sheela buys us movie tickets.I dont like to complain but now its too much. Husband: U shud be ashamed; uve still got 1 sister and 2 brothers, who dont send us even a single penny.

Man calls mental hospital & asks if there is anybody in Room 27. Lady checks & tells him that the room is empty. Man: Good,that means I have really escaped.!