Boy- From the day I m ur friend, I m not able to eat, drink or smoke.Girl- how sweet, so u r madly in LOVE with me..!Boy- SHUT UP..!!, U made my pocket empty.

Sam to Ram:Did U kill mosquitoes?Yes.But why they still bite me at night?They must be widows of the dead ones.

Husband 1: Why do u take your wife only to night clubs? Husband 2: Buddy by the time she gets ready no other place is open!

Guide: I welcome u all to the Niagra falls. These are the world s largest Waterfalls and the sound intensity of the Waterfall is so high, sound of even 20 supersonic planes passing cant be heard! Now may I request the ladies to keep quiet so that we can hear the Niagra falls??

Wife:Honey wht ru looking4? Husband:Nothing. Wife:Nothing?U've been reading our marriage certificate 4an hour?Husband:I was just luking 4d expriy date!

Lady2Doc:let my husband come inside.Doctor:Trust me,I am a Gentleman.Lady:I know,but Nurse is sitting outside &my husband is not A gentleMan

TEACHER== Name four members of the cat family? STUDENTS== Daddy cat,Mummy cat and two kittens

Commerce professor asks the student: what is the most important source of finance for starting business? Student: "Father in law".

A teacher was asking her class what their fathers did. When she asked young Johnny, he said, "My father's dead, Miss." "Oh, I am sorry, Johnny. In that case, what did he do before he died?" "He went blue and collapsed."

Teacher : If u have 12 chocolates u gv 5 to Leena,3 to Tina,4 to Meena, den what wil u get? Student: 3 NEW GIRLFRIENDS

Raj: Meet my wife Divya. Ajay: Oh, I know her... Raj: How? Ajay: We had been sleeping together. Raj: What the Hell? Ajay: 10 years ago, in our History classes..

Q: What did the gangster's son tell his dad when he failed his examination? A: Dad they questioned me for 3 hours but I never told them anything