T'CHER:What do we do with crude oil?S'dent:Teach it some manners

*A young accountant stayed late at the office day after day. Finally, the boss called him in and asked for an explanation. "Well, you see sir," he stammered, "my wife works, too-- and if I get home before she does, I have to cook the dinner."

Every man wants a wife who is beautiful, understanding, economical and a good cook..... But the law allows only one wife

Men who have pierced ears are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.

LAST NIGHT SHE CAME TO MY BED,LAYED ON MY BODY,TOOK LIQUID FROM MY BODY AND GOT SATISFACTION .SHE WAS A MOSQUITO

Boy: Mummy, if I failed in this exam I'll commite suicide.Mothe'Shut up! Never say that. If U try to do so I'll just kill you..

Teen boy:Dad I want to be like Ghandhiji Dad:Good why not..!Boy:Thanx Dad so lets start with marriage as Gandhiji were married at age of 14

A Student goes into a library & asks for a book on suicide..! Librarian: "Get lost dude, U won't bring it back.

Try this ,its fun Go to msg Select New msg activate T9 (or dictionary as in your mobile) & type these keys... 4#260#2#3665#42#42#42# try now and do re....

Mr A: my wife kisses me every night when I get home. Mr B: mine too, but only 2 c if I have been drinking.

Young Son: Is it true, Dad, that in some parts of Africa, a Man doesn't know his wife until he marries her? Dad: That happens in every country, son.

A sardar on an interview for the post of detective was asked a question - Interviewer - Who killed Gandhiji ? Sardar - Thanks for giving me the job, I will investigate.