Teache"Where is Himalaya?"Student: "Madam, I dont know."Teache"Dont know?? Stand on the desk."Student: "I still cant see.

Frnd1: u have married with 1 of the twin sisters, how do u recognize ur wife? Frnd2: why should I ? : )

Q: What did the gangster's son tell his dad when he failed his examination? A: Dad they questioned me for 3 hours but I never told them anything

Teache Give An example to use neither-nor. Boy: When girls wear tight fittings, neither they are comfortable nor we are comfortable…

1st thief:Oh ! The police is here. Quick! Jump out of the window!2nd thief: But this is the 13th floor.1st thief: Hurry! this is no time for superstitions

Two men were talking at a party. "I," said the first,"only believe half of what people tell me." "Why ?" "I'm a lawyer." "I believe twice what people tell me." "What are you ?" "A tax inspector."

Teacher : Peter,why are you late for school again? PeteWell, Miss,I dreamed that I was playing football and the game went into extra time

Doctor, doctor, will i be able to play the violin after the operation?" "yes of course...." "Great ! i never could before"

Hello My son won't come to school today,he has fever. Teacher: Oh,who's speaking? Boy: This is my father

Dentist: I have to pull the aching tooth, but don't worry it will take just five minutes. Patient: And how much will it cost? Dentist: It's Rs 1000. Patient: One thousand for just a few minutes work??? Dentist: I can extract it very slowly if you like

Boy- From the day I m ur friend, I m not able to eat, drink or smoke.Girl- how sweet, so u r madly in LOVE with me..!Boy- SHUT UP..!!, U made my pocket empty.

LAST NIGHT SHE CAME TO MY BED,LAYED ON MY BODY,TOOK LIQUID FROM MY BODY AND GOT SATISFACTION .SHE WAS A MOSQUITO