A company held a contest for kids with the theme: "The nicest thing My Father Ever Did For Me." One kid answered "He married my mother."

Teacher:What was the first think Akbar did on ascending to the throne?Student:Well,he sat down

An englishman, bihari & punjabi were standing on roof. They decided to throw down whatever was available in excess with them. Englishman threw pounds, Bihari threw rice & Punjabi threw the Bihari down.

Girl: Do U love me?Boy:'Ofcourse darling i do. Girl:Wil U luv me after marriage also? Boy:Tht depends on ur husband. If he allows Me 2 luv u.

Devdas’s matrimonial ad- Wanted wife. Age no bar! Height No bar! Luks no bar! Caste No Bar! But gal’s father shoul have his own Bar.

There are Three Scientist Come together to Make AeroPlain 1 from U.S.A. 2 from Japan & 3 from India. The American Scientist arranged for Necessary Raw Materials Then Japanis Scientis Assembeled the Plain At Last Indian Scientis paint on the plain i.e Made in India

A lady gave an advertisement in the classifieds : "Husband Wanted". Next day she received a 100 letters. They all said da same thing : "U can have mine"

Teacher: Johny, how do you spell "crocodile"? Manu: "K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L" Teacher: No, that's wrong Manu: Maybe it's wrong, but you ask me how I spell it!

Lady1:"What do u think bout husbands?" Lady2:"They r like OWLS..!" Lady1:"How?"Lady2:"They see good things in their wives only in the night.

Doctor implants New Ear 2 a man Man: "U fraud,U gave me a woman's ear" Doc: It makes no difference Man: "It does,Now I hear everything but understand nothing"

A drunk was hauled into court. "Mister," the judge began, "You ve been brought here for drinking." "Great," the drunk exclaimed." When do we get started?"…

Honey, when we get married, I'll be there to share all your troubles and sorrows." "But I don't have any, my love." "I said, when we get married"