Undernormal conditions, most people tend to see what they want to see, hear what theywant to hear, and do what they want to do; in conflicts, their positionsbecome even more rigid and fixed.
Wheneveryou're in conflict with someone, there is one factor that can make thedifference between damaging your relationship and deepening it. That factoris attitude.
I hold it to be a proof of great prudence for men toabstain from threats and insulting words toward an enemy, for neither ...diminishes the strength of the enemy; but the one makes him more cautious,and the other increases his hatred of you and makes him
Talkback to your internal critic. Train yourself to recognize and write downcritical thoughts as they go through your mind. Learn why these thoughts areuntrue and practice talking and writing back to them.