TEACHER : Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?SIMON : No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.

Teacher:Draw A Diagram Of Bacteria Pappu:Here It Is Sir Teacher:Where? u Haven't Drawn Anything Pappu:Sir,Cn u See Bacteria Withot Microscop

The two partners in a law firm were having lunch when suddenly one of them jumped up from the table and said, "I have to go back to the office. I forgot to lock the safe!" "What are you worried about?" the other said. "We're both here."

Girl: When we get married, I want to share all your worries, troubles and lighten your burden. Boy: It’s very kind of you, darling, but I don’t have any worries or troubles. Girl: Well that’s because we aren’t married yet.

Two Cockroach were Hospitalized for Injuries... 1st asked:How come here,BAYGON..? 2nd said:No Man,PARAGON..

Stalking into a police station late one night, a man demands to speak to the burglar who broke into his home. "Sorry,that's against the rule," says the desk sergeant."You didn't get it," says the man."I need to know how he got in without waking my wife."

Why does history keep repeating it self? Because we weren't listening the first time !

Boy:My Gf broke up wth me & sent me d Kissng pics of her & her new Bf Frnd: Oh.its 2 bad Boy: Ya I know..dats Y i sent those pics 2 her Dad

Husband 1: Why do u take your wife only to night clubs? Husband 2: Buddy by the time she gets ready no other place is open!

Q:There is always a sign board'DRIVE SLOWLY' near school,bt never near girls college.Why? Ans:BECAUSE HERE VEHICLES AUTOMATICALLY GET SLOW!

Husband says"When Im gone you'll nevr find another man like me". Wife replied"What makes you think I'd want another man like you?!!!".

Devdas’s matrimonial ad- Wanted wife. Age no bar! Height No bar! Luks no bar! Caste No Bar! But gal’s father shoul have his own Bar.