Santa:What's the use of having a train schedule if the trains are always late. Engineer:How would we know they were late,if we didn't have a schedule?

Judge: This is 3rd time u are coming to court. Dont U feel shame? Sardar:"u are coming daily, dont u feel shame?

santa Singh had been standing in the middle of his field (farm) for a long time. While passing by Santa Singh asked him what he was doing. Banta replied, 'I heard those who are outstanding in their field are awarded the Nobel prize. So I waiting for mine!

'Take me to the 10th floor,' said Banta Singh as he entered the lift of a high rise bulding. When the lift reached its destination, the liftman opened its gates and said, 'The 10th floor, beta.' 'Why did you call me beta?' demanded Banta Singh. D'I am not your son.' I called you beta because I brought you up,' replied the liftman.

After returning back from a foreign trip, santa asked his wife, Do I look like a foreigner? Wife: No! Why? Santa: In London a lady asked me r u a foreigner?

Santa walks into a library & says, "Can I have a burger and coke?" Librarian, "I'm sorry, this is a library." Santa whispers, "Can I have a burger & fries?"

Santa k ghar ladki hui Banta:Jab ladki badi hogi to ladke ise chedenge. Santa: Maine iska intezam kar liya! Banta:kya? Santa: Iska naam DiDi rakha hai!

Santa always study in front of a mirror because of 3 reasons:1. It helps saving revision time.2. He can keep a watch on himself.3. He likes combined studies

Santa proposed to a girl...... Girl said: 'I'm 1 yr elder to you'. Santa said: 'Oye, no problem Soniye, I'll marry you next year

Girlfriend-Tum to bas apne kam me lage rehte ho..Meri to koi parwah hi nahi hai tumhe! santa -Oye,Pyar karne wale kisi ki parwah nahi karte!

Teacher: Pappu, TAMSO MA JYOTIR GAMYA" shloka ka kya arth hai? Pappu: Tum so jayo maa, mein Jyoti ke pass ja raha hoon.

An astronomer was watching the sky from his telescope. Santa was observing him. Suddenly a star falls, seeing that Santa shouted, "Kya nishana lagaya hai!"