santa took an answering machine home and fixed it home somewhere in Rajasthan,but two days later disconnected it because he was getting complaints like "Saala phone utha ke bolta hai ghar pe nahin hai" ( "he picks up the receiver and then says he is not at home" )
Ek baar ek sardar sukhe khet mein boat chala raha hota hai. Doosara sardar apni Biwi ko leke scooter pe jaa raha tha. Pehle Sardar ko boat chalate dekh, woh apni biwi se kehta hai "dekho aise sardaro ne hi to sardar ka naam kharab kar rakha hai, woh to mujhe swimming nahi aati, nahi to mein usey bahut maarta."
Santa: "God, if you give me 100 rupees, I will donate 50 rupees in temple". (After waliking some distance, he finds a 50 rupee note) Santa: "Shame on you God, you don't even trust me a little? You have already taken your share!"