santa orders pizza. Waiter: Sir shud i cut it into 4 pieces or into 8 pieces? santa: 4 hi karde 8 khaye nahi jayenge

A teacher told all students in a class to write an essay on a cricket match. All were busy writing except Santa. He wrote "DUE TO RAIN, NO MATCH!"

Santa: My wedding is going to happen. Banta: Whats the problem now.? Santa: My wife did'nt know it...!

Ek baar ek sardar sukhe khet mein boat chala raha hota hai. Doosara sardar apni Biwi ko leke scooter pe jaa raha tha. Pehle Sardar ko boat chalate dekh, woh apni biwi se kehta hai "dekho aise sardaro ne hi to sardar ka naam kharab kar rakha hai, woh to mujhe swimming nahi aati, nahi to mein usey bahut maarta."

Banta: yaar tum itne bade ho gaye ho aur abi tak dadi aur mooch nahi aayi. SANTA: yaar main apni maa pe gaya hu na isliye.

What frustrated Banta when his wife gave birth to twins ? He wonders who is the father of the second son!

SrdI kis my wif b4 i go to office everyday,& U? Frnd: I kis ur wif after u go to office everyday. SardaHa ha i'm 1st.

"Darling," said Banta to his new bride, Preeto, "Now that we are married, do you think you will be able to live on my small income?" "Of course, dearest, no trouble," she replied. "But what will you live on?"

SANTAr: Doctor help me, mein jab baat karta huun to muje sirf awaaz sunai deti hai, aadmi nahi dikhta. Dr: Aaisa kab hota hai? SANTA: Phone karte waqt.

Santa : People consider me as "God"Banta : How do you know??Santa : When I went to the park today,everybody said, Oh God! Uve come again.

santa opens his lunch box in the middle of the road… why? Just to confirm whether he is going to or coming back from office.

What do smart Santa and UFOs have in common? You always hear about them but you never see them.