Santa opened a petrol pump, but not even one customer went there. You know why? Because he opened petrol pump on second floor..

Banta: What's the difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer? Santa: The taste.

TeacheWhat is ur father?Santa: I.C.S. in summer & P.C.S. in winterTeacheWats dat?Santa: Ice-cream seller in summer & Pakoda chat seller in winter

Santa saw a Beautiful Girl,he Went and Kissed her. Girl: "STUPID what r u doing?" Santa: B.Com final year"

santa: ek kilo gaaye ka dhoodh dena.. banta: lekin tumhara bartan to bhut chhota hai.. santa: theek hai to fir bakri ka de do..

Banta to his wife:Get married to Santa after my death. Wife:But why? He is your no. 1 enemy. Banta:This would be the best way to avenge Santa

Santa to nurse-I luv u tumne mera dil chura liya hai,Nurse-Chal jhutha humne to sirf kidney churayi hai dil ko to hath bhi nahi lagaya…

santa to banta… why are you watching the funeral by BINOCULAR… santa replies because DUR KA RISHTEDAR THA yaar!

Santa in mysore palace, Tourist guide sir PLz don sit there, It's Tippu sultan's chair. santa - oye don't worry yaar I will get up when he comes

Banta: Why is the Police nicknamed "The heart of the country"? Santa: It beats, beats, beats.

A Sardar buys a ticket and wins the lottery. He goes to Delhi to claim it and the man verifies his ticket number. The Sardar says, "I want my 20 lakhs. The man replied, "No, sir. It doesn't work that way. We give you one lakh today and then you'll get the rest spread out for the next 19 weeks." The Sardar said, "Oh, no. I want all my money right now! I won it and I want it." Again, the man explained that he would only get a lakh that day and the rest during the next 19 weeks. The Sardar, furious with the man, screams out, "Look, I want my money! If you're not going to give me my 20 lakhs right now, then I want my five rupees back!"

Santa ki shaadi ek nurse se ho gayi. Banta: Aur santa, kaisi nibh rahi hai? Santa: Pooch mat yaar, jab tak sister na kaho, bolti hi nahi