Wife: Why are you home so early? Husband: My boss told me to go to hell.

Teacher: Johny, how do you spell "crocodile"? Manu: "K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L" Teacher: No, that's wrong Manu: Maybe it's wrong, but you ask me how I spell it!

Police to a drunkard: Where are you going? Man: To listen to a lecture on the ill effects of drinking, on health. Pol: Who'll lecture at Midnite? Man:My wife,.

He said... Do u love me just coz my father left me a fortune? She said... No stupid, I'd love u no matter who left you the money!

The definition of a perfect Wife? - one who helps the husband with the dishes..

Reporter: How does it feel to become a millionaire? Millionaire: Sad, because I am not a billionaire.

TEACHER : Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.WINNIE : Me!

Why do elephants never forget? Because nobody ever tells them anything

LAST NIGHT SHE CAME TO MY BED,LAYED ON MY BODY,TOOK LIQUID FROM MY BODY AND GOT SATISFACTION .SHE WAS A MOSQUITO

Boy: I am not rich like akash, I don't even have a big car like rohit. But I really love you! Girl: I love you too, but tell me more about akash.

Wife: Im ashamed of the way we live; papa pays the house rent, my brother sends food and clothing, aunty pays our electric and water bills and my friend Sheela buys us movie tickets.I dont like to complain but now its too much. Husband: U shud be ashamed; uve still got 1 sister and 2 brothers, who dont send us even a single penny.

Husband to wife: Why do you keep reading our marriage licence? Wife to Husband: I'm looking for a loophole