Dad : Son, what do you want for your birthday? Son : Not much dad, just a radio with a sports car around it.

Doctor implants New Ear 2 a man Man: "U fraud,U gave me a woman's ear" Doc: It makes no difference Man: "It does,Now I hear everything but understand nothing"

A boy goes to see a cabare dance.His mom gets angry & asks him:Did u see anything ther that u were not supposed to see?Boy:Yes,I saw DAD

If your wife wants to learn to drive, don't stand in her way.

What is the next thing a Man should do after winning an argument wit his Wife ?...........Apologise

A man went to the police station wishing to speak with the burglar who had broken into his house the night before. “You’ll get your chance in court,” said the desk sergeant. “No, no, no!”, said the man. “I want to know how he got into the house without waking my wife. I’ve been trying to do that for years!”

Q: Why did the scientist install a knocker on his door?A: He wanted to win the No-bell prize.

Two men are discussing their lives. One says, "I'm getting married. I'm tired of a messy apartment, dirty dishes, and no clothes to wear." The other one says, "I'm getting divorced for the same reasons."

Patient: Doctor, you must help me. I'm under such a lot of stress. I keep losing my temper with people. Doctor: Tell me about your problem. Patient: I just did, you stupid bastard!

Men who have pierced ears are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.

Boy: Y did Gandhiji have no hair on his head? TeacheIts sign of inteligence Boy: Now i undrstand y girls have so long hair!...

TEACHER : Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.WINNIE : Me!