Man: God, how long is a million years to you? God: A second. Man: How much is $ 1 Million to you? God: A cent. Man: Can I borrow a cent? God: Wait a second. =)

Santa Banta find a bomb Santa and Banta find three hand grenades and decide to take them to the police station. "What if one of them explodes before we get there?" asks Banta. "Don’t worry about it," says Santa. "We’ll just lie and tell them we only found two."

Question Girl : Do you love me ? Boy : Yes Dear Girl : Would you die for me ? Boy : No, mine is undying love!

Guide: I welcome u all to the Niagra falls. These are the world s largest Waterfalls and the sound intensity of the Waterfall is so high, sound of even 20 supersonic planes passing cant be heard! Now may I request the ladies to keep quiet so that we can hear the Niagra falls??

A new Boy joins class_ He finds two Boys similar in appearance. Asks one of them Are you both twins...? Boy replies No. We are neighbour

Little Johnny: Teacher, can I go to the bathroom? TeacheLittle Johnny, MAY I go to the bathroom? Little Johnny: But I asked first!

Sir:Tom,wot wud happen if there is a3rd world war?Tom:Tht wud be terrible.Sir:Why?Tom:There wll be another chapter in our history book

Q:Define a true music lover? Ans: a girl is singing in bathroom while taking bath & a boy near the keyhole is using his ears & not his eyes.

Mr A: my wife kisses me every night when I get home. Mr B: mine too, but only 2 c if I have been drinking.

School girl : I dont want to take SEX EDUCATION class Teacher : Why not? School girl : Someone told me FINAL EXAM would be oral!

Boy: Mummy, if I failed in this exam I'll commite suicide.Mothe'Shut up! Never say that. If U try to do so I'll just kill you..

Two men were talking at a party. "I," said the first,"only believe half of what people tell me." "Why ?" "I'm a lawyer." "I believe twice what people tell me." "What are you ?" "A tax inspector."