A company held a contest for kids with the theme: "The nicest thing My Father Ever Did For Me." One kid answered "He married my mother."

Boy: I am not rich like akash, I don't even have a big car like rohit. But I really love you! Girl: I love you too, but tell me more about akash.

Teacher:The best way to double the money in stock market!Student:Invest 4 times the money!!---

Teacher: Now, Johny, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating? Manu: No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook.

Q. What do men and beer bottles have in common? A. They are both empty from the neck up.

Every man wants a wife who is beautiful, understanding, economical and a good cook..... But the law allows only one wife

When I was young I used to pray for a bike, then I realized that God doesn't work that way, so I stole a bike and prayed for forgiveness

TEACHER== Name four members of the cat family? STUDENTS== Daddy cat,Mummy cat and two kittens

What is the height of mixed emotions??? when ur mother in law falls from 7th floor on ur mercedes

Santa Banta find a bomb Santa and Banta find three hand grenades and decide to take them to the police station. "What if one of them explodes before we get there?" asks Banta. "Don’t worry about it," says Santa. "We’ll just lie and tell them we only found two."

Mr. Verma got the following letter: If u dont send Rs.2 lakhs within 3 days time, we will kidnap ur wife.To this, he sent the following reply: I m very sorry,I cant fulfill ur demand, but I m sure u ll keep up ur promise.

Tcher: 3 grls are walking in da road. Turn the sentence in to exclamitory. studnt: WOW!