Can I go to the theatre? Asks a mosquito ot her mother. "yes but be aware, pay attention during the applause."

Teacher:The best way to double the money in stock market!Student:Invest 4 times the money!!---

Never Explain Yourself to Anyone Because The person Who Likes U Doesnt Need It. And The Person Who Dislikes U Wont belive it....!!

Patient: Doctor, you must help me. I'm under such a lot of stress. I keep losing my temper with people. Doctor: Tell me about your problem. Patient: I just did, you stupid bastard!

Wife: u know, husband and wife are not allowed 2 be together in heaven!!! Husband: yes, that's y it's called heaven

Dad : Son, what do you want for your birthday? Son : Not much dad, just a radio with a sports car around it.

First Lady-"If you dont love your husband why dont you divorce him???"2nd Lady-Oh I hate him so much that I dont want to see him haappy

Dad:Why aren't you doing well in history?Pappu:Because the Teacher keeps on asking things that happened before my birth

Reporter: How does it feel to become a millionaire? Millionaire: Sad, because I am not a billionaire.

*A young accountant stayed late at the office day after day. Finally, the boss called him in and asked for an explanation. "Well, you see sir," he stammered, "my wife works, too-- and if I get home before she does, I have to cook the dinner."

young girl praying:pls God marry me with intelligent man god replied: thats impossible, because intelligent men don't get married

PAPPU : Daddy, have you ever been to Egypt ? FATHER : No. Why do you ask that? PAPPU: Well, where did you get THIS mummy then