TEACHER : What a pair of strange socks you are wearing, one is green and one is blue with red spots ! PAPPU: Yes it’s really strange. I’ve got another pair just like that at home.

A cop stops a drunk man and asks: Where you going? I'm going to listen the lecture about the harm of the drunkenness and alcoholism. At night? And who will give a lecture?My wife and mother-in-law!

DAD TO SON: When i beat u how do u controll ur anger. son: I START CLEANING TOILET DAD: how does that satisfies u? SON:i clean with ur tooth brush

Wife:Wherever we keep d money, our son steals it.I don't know what to do about itHus: Keep it in his ENGINEERING books. He'l never touch.

Teacher: pappu, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago. pappu: Me!

A sardar was always teasing his wife "Teen bachon ki maa". One day she got angry & teased him back "ek bache ka baap

Doc & engg loved d same girl. Engg before going out of station for a week gave 7 apples to the girl. Why? B'coz an apple a day keeps doctor away

Teacher:I wish you would pay a little attention!Student:I'm paying as little as I can sir

An AMERICAN couple on african safari. Suddenly a huge lion springs up n seizes d wife wit its giant jaws.. Wife: "Shoot!, shoot for Christ's sake!" Hus: "I can't! I hav run out of film."

Teacher: Johny, how do you spell "crocodile"? Manu: "K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L" Teacher: No, that's wrong Manu: Maybe it's wrong, but you ask me how I spell it!

Wife: You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why? Husband: When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears. Wife: You see, how miraculous and powerful am I for you? Husband: Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, “What other problem can there be greater than this one?”

Q:There is always a sign board'DRIVE SLOWLY' near school,bt never near girls college.Why? Ans:BECAUSE HERE VEHICLES AUTOMATICALLY GET SLOW!