Boss: (to employee) - Experts say humor on the job relieves tension in this time of down-sizing, Knock, Knock. Employee: Who's there? Boss: Not you anymore.

Wife going to Wife returns. Husband:-where is my gift? Wife:-wait 4 9months. London. Wife:-Do u want anything from England? Husband:-ya... English girl.

The two partners in a law firm were having lunch when suddenly one of them jumped up from the table and said, "I have to go back to the office. I forgot to lock the safe!" "What are you worried about?" the other said. "We're both here."

Q. What do men and beer bottles have in common? A. They are both empty from the neck up.

Husband says"When Im gone you'll nevr find another man like me". Wife replied"What makes you think I'd want another man like you?!!!".

Teache"Where is Himalaya?"Student: "Madam, I dont know."Teache"Dont know?? Stand on the desk."Student: "I still cant see.

Honey, when we get married, I'll be there to share all your troubles and sorrows." "But I don't have any, my love." "I said, when we get married"

*A young accountant stayed late at the office day after day. Finally, the boss called him in and asked for an explanation. "Well, you see sir," he stammered, "my wife works, too-- and if I get home before she does, I have to cook the dinner."

Teacher:Draw A Diagram Of Bacteria Pappu:Here It Is Sir Teacher:Where? u Haven't Drawn Anything Pappu:Sir,Cn u See Bacteria Withot Microscop

An englishman, bihari & punjabi were standing on roof. They decided to throw down whatever was available in excess with them. Englishman threw pounds, Bihari threw rice & Punjabi threw the Bihari down.

Q:Define a true music lover? Ans: a girl is singing in bathroom while taking bath & a boy near the keyhole is using his ears & not his eyes.

What does Santa do after taking a xerox? He compares it with the original for any spelling mistakes.