Guide: Welcome 2

Guide: Welcome 2
Guide: Welcome 2 Niagra falls. Sound intensity is so high dat even 20 supersonic jets cant b heard. Now may i requst d ladies 2 b silent so we can hear d falls
  

Jan, 13 2012     159 chars (1 sms)     1096 views       Funny

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1 day u'll B srprisd 2 c ME beside U. U & ME laughing, U & ME crying, U & ME dreaming, U & ME holding on, U & ME... just U & ME sitting in a MENTAL HOSPITAL & ME CHECKING U.
I mixed RUM in water and got drunk. I mixed BRANDY in water and got drunk. I mixed WHISKY in water and got drunk again. Now I have decided never to drink water again !!!
Men want 3qualities in wives: Economist in kitchen ,artist in home&devil in bed. But they get artist in kitchen,devil in home and economist in bed.
How do you express two words,with exactly the opposite meanings,in a single sentence...?Any guesses?No?Say:"HAPPILY MARRIED"
Tumse mila main kal to, mere dil mein hua ek sound, Lekin aaj tum mili to kehti ho: Your file not found!
Defination of a NURSE-> A young and beautiful woman who fingers u in all places n holds ur hand and then expects ur pulse to be normal
First the engagement ring, then the wedding ring, then the suffering.
************** Give one english word for...... apne kiye pe pani pher dena ..............? ..........? ......? "I I_____FLUSH -() - )____( *************"
Question: What happened when two sardars were waiting for buses numbered 1 and 2? Answer: When bus number 12 came, they both climbed on!
Someone asked me about ur age. Well, I said: “The way u dress-19, ur skin-15, the way u speak-20, the way u walk-18. in total u look 72 years old.
TeachIf U hv 12 Chocolates & u giv 5 to SONAL, 4 to NEHA & 3 to TINA den wat wil U hv Now? SAHIL: 3 New Galfrndz!
Kabristhan ke cahaukidar ke kabar pe baite hue kutte ki gale ke pat mein chupe hue virus ki sar ke baal ke andar ki bacteria ki kasam tusse!!! Great !!! ho!!!