What's the quietest place in the world? The complaint department at the parachute packing plant

Two beggars met. Two software engineers met. Both asked the same question to each other. Guess What 'So? Which platform are u working on?

Why does history keep repeating it self? Because we weren't listening the first time !

Wife going to Wife returns. Husband:-where is my gift? Wife:-wait 4 9months. London. Wife:-Do u want anything from England? Husband:-ya... English girl.

Doctor to lady: U look exactly like my 3rd wife. Lady: How many wife do u have? Docto2.

Santa's wife dies. He is calm, but his wife's lover is crying furiously... Finally, santa consoles him: Don't worry buddy, I will marry again

An englishman, bihari & punjabi were standing on roof. They decided to throw down whatever was available in excess with them. Englishman threw pounds, Bihari threw rice & Punjabi threw the Bihari down.

If your wife wants to learn to drive, don't stand in her way.

Wife: Im ashamed of the way we live; papa pays the house rent, my brother sends food and clothing, aunty pays our electric and water bills and my friend Sheela buys us movie tickets.I dont like to complain but now its too much. Husband: U shud be ashamed; uve still got 1 sister and 2 brothers, who dont send us even a single penny.

Man to Doc:Is there any way for long life? Doc:Get married. Man:Will it help? Doc:No,but the thought of long life will never come to your mind

A Student goes into a library & asks for a book on suicide..! Librarian: "Get lost dude, U won't bring it back.

Reporter: How does it feel to become a millionaire? Millionaire: Sad, because I am not a billionaire.