A cop stops a

A cop stops a
A cop stops a drunk man and asks: Where you going? I'm going to listen the lecture about the harm of the drunkenness and alcoholism. At night? And who will give a lecture?My wife and mother-in-law!
  

Jan, 17 2012     197 chars (2 sms)     1151 views       Jokes > English Jokes

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Man Conducting Marketing Survey asked a Lady:"Which Book Has HeLped you most in your Life?"Lady:My Husband's "Cheque Book!"
I bought my wife a new car. She called and said, "There was water in the carburetor." I asked her, "Where's the car?" She replied,. In the lake."
A guy told his friend, “My father’s name is laughing and my mother’s name is smiling.” So the friend asks, “Is your name kidding?” The guy says, “That’s my brother’s name and I am joking.”
Dad: if u Pass in the exam i will Present u 1 Cycle.Son: if i fail?Dad: i will Present 10 Cycle.Son: why?Dad: To Open Cycle Shop.
A lady had 8 sons all named KEVIN, when asked how she differentiates while calling, she replied “by their surname”.
Teacher: Johny, how do you spell "crocodile"? Manu: "K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L" Teacher: No, that's wrong Manu: Maybe it's wrong, but you ask me how I spell it!
The two partners in a law firm were having lunch when suddenly one of them jumped up from the table and said, "I have to go back to the office. I forgot to lock the safe!" "What are you worried about?" the other said. "We're both here."
Dad : Son, what do you want for your birthday? Son : Not much dad, just a radio with a sports car around it.
I went to see the doctor who said, just be a little patient.
Man receives telegram: Wife dead-should be buried or cremated? Man: Don't take any chances. Burn the body and bury the ash.
Two flies order some food in a restaurant. One says: I'll take the shit with garlic. And I'll take the same, but without garlic, said the other one. I don't like to have bad breath.
Customer: Waiter, what's the meaning of this fly in my tea up? Waiter: I wouldn't know sir, I'm a waiter, not a fortune teller.