Man receives telegram: Wife dead-should be buried or cremated? Man: Don't take any chances. Burn the body and bury the ash.

First Lady-"If you dont love your husband why dont you divorce him???"2nd Lady-Oh I hate him so much that I dont want to see him haappy

Little Johnny: Teacher, can I go to the bathroom? TeacheLittle Johnny, MAY I go to the bathroom? Little Johnny: But I asked first!

MAchine inventd 2 CAtch Thieves IN UK,IT C Aught 50 theives in 30 Min SPAIN:IT CAught 110 in 1hr IndiA:In 15 Min MAchine was Stolen

Husband: Today is sunday & I have to enjoy it. So i bought 3 movie tickets. Wife: why three? Husband: 4 u and ur parents.

Teacher: Now, Johny, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating? Manu: No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook.

Wife: I hate the Beggar who came yesterday!Husband: Why??Wife: I gave him food yesterday & today He gifted me a book"How to Cook"!!

Dad:Why aren't you doing well in history?Pappu:Because the Teacher keeps on asking things that happened before my birth

Teacher: Sonu, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his? Sonu: No, teacher, it's the same dog

Author: "I'm convinced that the publishers have a conspiracy against me." Friend: "What makes you think so?" Author: "Ten of them have refused the same story."

A heart Melting luv story.Girl:I Cant Marry U, my family members refused.Boy: Who r dey 2 Stop Our luv?Girl: "My husbnd & 3 CHILDREN"!

Dentist: I have to pull the aching tooth, but don't worry it will take just five minutes. Patient: And how much will it cost? Dentist: It's Rs 1000. Patient: One thousand for just a few minutes work??? Dentist: I can extract it very slowly if you like