T'CHER:What do we do with crude oil?S'dent:Teach it some manners

D bos came early in d morng one day n found his manager kissing his secratry. He shouted at him,"is dis what i pay 4 u"? D manager rplid- no sir dis i do free

Honey, when we get married, I'll be there to share all your troubles and sorrows." "But I don't have any, my love." "I said, when we get married"

One day a man inserted an 'advert' in the local classifieds: "Wife wanted". Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine."

Boy friend is fun & husband is gun boy friend is light of moon & husband is month of june boy friend is tooty fruity & husband is qismat phooti

Q. What do men and beer bottles have in common? A. They are both empty from the neck up.

Two Cockroach were Hospitalized for Injuries... 1st asked:How come here,BAYGON..? 2nd said:No Man,PARAGON..

Man receives telegram: Wife dead-should be buried or cremated? Man: Don't take any chances. Burn the body and bury the ash.

Sir:G.Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree,but also admitted doing it. Now,kid, do you know why his father didn't punish him?"kid:Because George still had the axe in his hand.

Stalking into a police station late one night, a man demands to speak to the burglar who broke into his home. "Sorry,that's against the rule," says the desk sergeant."You didn't get it," says the man."I need to know how he got in without waking my wife."

What do you call a letter delivered from a chimney? A. Black mail

Can I go to the theatre? Asks a mosquito ot her mother. "yes but be aware, pay attention during the applause."