TEACHER : Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?SIMON : No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.

Wife: Im ashamed of the way we live; papa pays the house rent, my brother sends food and clothing, aunty pays our electric and water bills and my friend Sheela buys us movie tickets.I dont like to complain but now its too much. Husband: U shud be ashamed; uve still got 1 sister and 2 brothers, who dont send us even a single penny.

A sardar on an interview for the post of detective was asked a question - Interviewer - Who killed Gandhiji ? Sardar - Thanks for giving me the job, I will investigate.

What did one magnet say to the other? I find you very attractive.

Man1: I do not want to marry bcoz I m afraid of woman.Man2: Get married soon, then u'll b afraid of only 1 woman n start loving other

TEACHER : “George Washington not only chopped down his father’s Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why his father didn’t punish him?” PAPPU : “Because George still had the axe in his hand?”

In A Book Shop Prospective Husband : Do U hav a Book Called "Man, de Master of Women". SalesGirl : d fiction Dept is on d Other Side,Sir

Why do elephants never forget? Because nobody ever tells them anything

TeacheHarbhajan is male or female? Student: Female. TeacheHow? Student: Just now commentator told "beautiful delivery by harbajan"

Can I go to the theatre? Asks a mosquito ot her mother. "yes but be aware, pay attention during the applause."

When I was young I used to pray for a bike, then I realized that God doesn't work that way, so I stole a bike and prayed for forgiveness

Girl: Will you love me after marriage also? Boy: This depends on your husband, if he allows me.