School girl : I dont want to take SEX EDUCATION class Teacher : Why not? School girl : Someone told me FINAL EXAM would be oral!

Mr. Verma got the following letter: If u dont send Rs.2 lakhs within 3 days time, we will kidnap ur wife.To this, he sent the following reply: I m very sorry,I cant fulfill ur demand, but I m sure u ll keep up ur promise.

LAST NIGHT SHE CAME TO MY BED,LAYED ON MY BODY,TOOK LIQUID FROM MY BODY AND GOT SATISFACTION .SHE WAS A MOSQUITO

TEACHER : Now, PAPPU, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating ? PAPPU: No sir, I don’t have to, my mom is a good cook.

A man went to the police station wishing to speak with the burglar who had broken into his house the night before. “You’ll get your chance in court,” said the desk sergeant. “No, no, no!”, said the man. “I want to know how he got into the house without waking my wife. I’ve been trying to do that for years!”

What do you call a letter delivered from a chimney? A. Black mail

Can I go to the theatre? Asks a mosquito ot her mother. "yes but be aware, pay attention during the applause."

young girl praying:pls God marry me with intelligent man god replied: thats impossible, because intelligent men don't get married

What is the height of mixed emotions??? when ur mother in law falls from 7th floor on ur mercedes

TEACHER== Name four members of the cat family? STUDENTS== Daddy cat,Mummy cat and two kittens

PAPPU : Daddy, have you ever been to Egypt ? FATHER : No. Why do you ask that? PAPPU: Well, where did you get THIS mummy then

Two beggars met. Two software engineers met. Both asked the same question to each other. Guess What 'So? Which platform are u working on?