Why r Egyptian children always confused? Because after death their daddy becomes Mummy

Question Girl : Do you love me ? Boy : Yes Dear Girl : Would you die for me ? Boy : No, mine is undying love!

A police recruit was asked during exam, "What would u do if u had to arrest ur own mother?" He said, "Call for backup."

tom enters kitchen and opens the sugar box. Sees inside and closes it. Wife observes the whole episode Again he comes and does the same stuff. Wife asks Why are you doing this? Tom replies: Doctor told to check sugar level regularly

What does Santa do after taking a xerox? He compares it with the original for any spelling mistakes.

Girl to her boyfriend: One kiss and I’ll be yours forever.The guy replies: Thanks for the warning.

One day a man inserted an 'advert' in the local classifieds: "Wife wanted". Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine."

LAST NIGHT SHE CAME TO MY BED,LAYED ON MY BODY,TOOK LIQUID FROM MY BODY AND GOT SATISFACTION .SHE WAS A MOSQUITO

Guide: I welcome u all to the Niagra falls. These are the world s largest Waterfalls and the sound intensity of the Waterfall is so high, sound of even 20 supersonic planes passing cant be heard! Now may I request the ladies to keep quiet so that we can hear the Niagra falls??

somu:mobile bill kitna hai? Callcentre gal:just dial 123 to knw ur current bill status. somu:abe Stupid current ka nahi mobile ka.

A father to his adopted son "Whats the height of laziness?" Son replied "What more than havin an adopted son.

Sir:B quiet boys!I hav a bad headache Sdent:Why dont u do wot mum Does whn she has a headache?Sir:Whats tht?Sdent:She sends us out to paly